Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Stake Office Secrets

Yesterday I was able to break into a high-security office facility in a stake center in Highland. This has been a goal of mine for some time.



Once again, I suspect there
is a trophy involved.

But what I found in that office was... let's say "enlightening." I cannot accurately tell, so instead I will show you the contents of one filing cabinet in particular. Be aware, you may learn more than you ever wanted to know about the underbelly of the church.

The following documents were all in the bottom drawer, buried under a veritable mountain of For the Strength of Youth pamphlets. After carefully photographing each piece of evidence, my position was compromised and I was forced to make a hasty getaway.

Any document that is hard to read (which would be any of them) can be clicked on to expand.

Exhibit A:





Exhibit B:



Exhibit C:



Exhibit D:



Exhibit E:



Possibly the most disturbing object, however, was found inside one of the "For the Strength of Youth pamphlets, cut out as if it were being hid in a prison.



Undetectable from the outside


I opened the book and extracted this:




Make what you will of these documents. My publisher will be getting back to me soon.

2 comments:

  1. Bah! For a minute I thought you were serious. That is until I saw the first document. Good one!

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  2. Oh my Andrew, your 'Tone Training' tape was the funniest thing I have ever seen. It's so true!! The women at General Conference drive me crazy with their voice tones. Very funny.

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